I am wonder why i am still the same, always think something bad.
Yesterday, try to chat with her de, but in the end i am sad after chat with her. Feel like she is always say something to 讽刺me, i really dono how to communicate with her.
Don't dare to tell him this, because i know he will feel 难为again.
Yesterday night had a nightmare again, she find pasal with me again until i can't control myself and quarrel with her.. How come i will have such dream?? When only i can over come this problem?
Really feel so sorry to him, always promise him i will change, but until now i still cant accept her and sometime think something non-sense..
What can i do to change my mind??
Decided to overnight at my friend's house before meet with him on Sunday, my friend also feel so weird why i don't want stay at his house then next day can straight away back together, why need to be so ma fan. At that moment, i actually don't know how to answer them, because they will never know that i cannot go his house, they don't know in his side, we are still underground.
How good if i am from Ipoh or somewhere near to KL, so that i no need ma fan my friend and also can back together with him.
I hope he will understand, although now the situation become i follow him because of her, but at first i say want to follow it's because i will worry of him if he back alone de. In the morning i am thinking to ask him find anyone of his friend to follow him back except her, but he told me she want follow before i told him that.
One wish for Birthday and New Year: i hope he will answer his mother like this if his mother asking him who follow his car back:" My Girl Friend will follow me back UTM."
How good if he can do this as a gift for my birthday~~
But i think he will never know this is what i wish him to do for me at this moment..
